coloring with the inner child

its about finding something real and raw. dropping the pretense of what art “is” or lofty aspirations of “performing” impressive feats in skill to become the ARTIST i always imagined. its about play. no fuss. hand held drawing tools. washes of color spread with abandon. repeating lines and blobs that take me, the one playing, on a journey into the mind. escape really. from expectation. and created without reverence to any gaze, my own or others. this is an attempt to reclaim some quiet inner child level essence of myself that has been conditioned away.

i don’t necessarily identify with what i create. it looks like someone else’s work sometimes and i am ok with that. no judgement, all play. and it works. a soothing portal into another world of truths, as represented by colors and strokes. to call it authentic expression feels trite. except for the fact that i simply can’t help but doodle these shapes. they want to be doodled. and with that act a kind of permission to myself in another realm forms.

the tipping point and NYC

so the pandemic happened. followed by burnout. i needed rest. luckily i was able to take time off to just be, and after feeling, journaling, processing, resting, something new emerged. i needed to paint again but this time not with makeup and not on skin but much larger. entirely separate from the beauty industry. this is the story of how a makeup artist, photographer and designer put a pause on her thriving business, gave up everything she knew(had been professionally known for) to explore making art. this blog invites you dear reader, friend and collector along for the ride as i transition to a whole new medium. some days are wins and feel ecstatic while others are total fails and I’ll do my best to share the gritty reality along the way.

if you’re new to the arts, this might be a fun blog to follow. i’m piecemealing an art education and deep diving in old and new techniques, art world practices and terminology, art history and everything tangentially related. i’m attending classes at ateliers and legendary art schools of nyc to develop an understanding of the arts and salvage any skills that still apply from my previous 20+ year career in makeup, fashion design and photography. join me as i attend galleries, exhibitions and the lesser known art haunts around town. if you aren’t already, follow me on IG @ssevlyn for the visual companion diary.

xoxo stephanie